The Club Penguin Massacre

One day after school I walked to my local gamestop to buy the latest expansion for club penguin, u see we had just entered warlords of ice berg and the expansion was shitty as usual so they rushed out the next one called the taken iceberg.

The story for this expansion was a group of radical Islamic penguins stole the iceberg, when I enetered the gamestop I saw the manager laying on the ground, I poked him on the belly and said what are u doing you stupid fuck little did I know he was dead!!!!!11!!1111!1!1!1!!111!

Beside him was a note with his username and password for his club penguin account the username was cpman666 and I cant tell u the password that’s illegal so don’t friken ask!

When I logged in to his account I noticed he had already had the latest expansion which is illegal because it comes out in 6 months 6 days and 6 hours, when I selected his penguin named greg666 I noticed he had a gun which im pretty sure u cant get guns in club penguin and if u can u prob have the sandy hook expansion rumored to release in 666 years so if u have this I will be calling the police because that is illegal.

I went to the night club to see what was good I obviously put the gun in my inventory so I wouldn’t scare the kiddos when I entered I saw a giant satan goose orgy with little penguin babies suspended from the ceiling which ya know that’s pretty normal since the Satanist dlc 3 days ago which I didn’t pirate because that’s illegal. I went over to the big sweaty satan and he grabbed my penguin penis and tore it off little did he know I was a transgender demi queer male so it was a fake penis anyway that my mom gave to me. At about 666 am yes my clock said 666 mutahar my lord and love posted a new episode of haunted gaming I proceded to jerk off for 18 hours until my penis was raw which I just peeled the skin off like a snake and continued for 12 more hours because of the weekly penis regrowth dlc.

But that’s not importaint. I continued to travel the vast world of club penguin with my trusty m4 carbine and my tec 9 hand revolver any penguin I met would soon be deader than disco I found the shady dealer and bot some good good from him allowing my penguin to gain the kush dlc 19.19$ then I turned around in my chair and a black man shot me in the head and I was dead the end.

stay tuned for part 2

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